For just a moment, perhaps just a flash of a second, I said to myself, “This is how people drown.”

Jan and I were on a small vacation with 2 other couples in the British Virgin Islands, hopping around to various islands and beaches, relaxing and enjoying the warmer breezes of the Caribbean. On one of the days, we decided to go snorkeling and loaded up on the dingy to go a few hundred yards to an underwater paradise filled with colorful fish and coral. I’ve never had a fear of water as I was that all American kid who swam competitively for 10 years, and even had a full ride scholarship to the University of Arkansas to swim there. I was comfortable with water and felt no fear about jumping into new waters.

That was about to change.

As we were getting into the water, and young lady named Rachel, on a dingy to the side of us, made small talk about my mustache and told me to “have fun”. The second I got into the water, I felt that something was wrong. So, I tried to blow out my snorkel thinking it might be plugged. It wasn’t. As I continued to swim to get to the colorful fish, I had this feeling that I just couldn’t get enough air. I kept going. I spotted a rock that was sticking up underwater and thought that if I could just get to that place, I would be able to catch my breath, and continue the undersea exploration. Not so. I got to the rock, and tried to sit on it to breathe, and it was then that I realized that I was in trouble.

I just couldn’t get enough air.

I tried to yell to Jan in the dingy, but there was no breath to push out a scream. I immediately decided I had to get back to the boat. I thought, surely, I can make it as it was only 25 yards away and I was used to holding my breath when I swam competitively. I forgot that the last time I did that was over 45 years ago. So, I began to head back and halfway to the dingy, I felt like I had to stop. I felt spent. I “ran out of gas”.

I rolled over on my back thinking that if I could just relax then I could catch a breath. Nothing doing. I couldn’t breathe. I rolled back over and what seemed to be 10 minutes was really just a flash of a second. As I looked at the water through my mask I thought, “this is how people drown”. Instantaneously I heard a voice. I felt it had to be God saying, “Go Mark, Go!” And I did. I started kicking feverishly toward the dingy, hoping that I just grab unto a rope or something to hold me up. I didn’t panic, but I’m sure didn’t think about anything or anyone else, except to get to that rope.

I reached it and Rachel, the young lady on the dingy to our side, said, “Hey, Mustache!” and evidently immediately knew I was in trouble. The moment she asked if I needed help, I coughed up blood and she later said that my skin color was a solid grey from having no oxygen.

I’m not sure what all happened the next 30 minutes, other than Rachel, in some way grabbed me. Jan had a hold of my hand trying to keep my head above water, and I continued to cough up a mess of blood and whatever else was coming up. There was a diver from Australia that suddenly appeared and loaded me into the dingy and off we went to the dock. The people with us were screaming for a doctor as I continued coughing and just trying to catch my breath. Little did I know that I had just had a life-threatening event.

A water ambulance showed up and 6 helmeted medical personnel and grabbed me and we took off for the hospital. The doctor there thought I was having a major heart attack as I showed all the symptoms, but it was later diagnosed as Swim Immersion Pulmonary Edema. My lungs were full of liquid and started bleeding as my heart pumped faster and faster screaming for oxygen. They all said I should have drowned.

As I laid all day on the hospital bed in the island hospital of Tortola, I recollected the number of times that parents have told me that they felt “they were drowning”, said, “they couldn’t keep their head above water,” and felt “helpless.” All feelings with a teen that was spinning out of control and all feelings that I had experienced that day. As I laid contemplating what all had happened this day, I thought about what I had just experienced first-hand was what so many parents had been sharing for the last 45 years. I now knew what they were talking about.

Let me share the thoughts that ran through my head as I was poked and prodded as medical staff tried to figure out what happened to me. I’ll keep it simple. Most parents dive into the “waters” of their child’s adolescence with a sense that they know what they’re doing, just like I did. When they encounter a little problem, they think there might be something wrong, but they keep on swimming.

They too, think, “If I can just make it to this “rock”, I’ll be okay.” When they get to that “rock”, many come to the realization they need help. Their screams for help often go unheard in the busy-ness of others “looking at their fish” and don’t hear. Many try to “head back”, hoping to get to a better place. When they’re out of breath, they begin to think that they can’t keep their head above water; many begin to panic. It’s here that many start to go under and feel like they’re drowning.

Isn’t it funny that in my flirt with death, I would be laying on a bed thinking about parents and their pursuit to not let their family “go under”? The thoughts kept coming to me and I couldn’t help but think, “Now I know what many families go through”.

The lessons here are many. But here are a few that might just help change a person’s life, their families and their destiny.

There are people all around us that feel like they’re drowning in their despair of dealing with family issues, rebellious teens, or unhappy marriages. And many, are so consumed with, “keeping their head above water” that there’s hardly any breath left to scream for help or ask for assistance. Just because people don’t ask, doesn’t mean they don’t need some help.

In my story, if it hadn’t been for Rachel noticing me, and just asking a simple question, “Do you need help”, she would have never reached for me, and I would have surely gone under. Isn’t that kind of funny. A girl that I never knew, had never seen, or had even talked to was the one that saved me that day.

Perhaps there are people around you that are just waiting and desperately needing someone to just ask if they need help. Maybe you’re their “Rachel” that can keep them from going under. Perchance God may be speaking to you, just like he did me, to “Go….Go!” to that person that is struggling for the lifeline of you! What an amazing way to make a connection….a connection that might just save one’s life.