I recently looked at some old photos of myself and was shocked to realize that I was wearing the same shirts today that I wore 20 years ago. I was so used to wearing them that I never took time to notice the nicer, newer shirts left for me in my closet as a gracious hint from my wife. I have the same problem with my shirts that many parents have with their old parenting techniques. There is nothing wrong with their tactics for kids in their younger years, but they are just a little outdated for teenagers.
If your son or daughter is responding negatively to some of your well-intended discipline, and your attempts to rein in their behavior is not working, don’t automatically assume that what you’re doing is all wrong. It’s just that your teen is changing at such an alarming rate that some of the established ways of doing things are no longer giving you the positive results they once were. Continue reading “Letting Go of the Rope”
It’s back to school time — the time of year I begin to hear concerns from parents of young girls who’ve just entered middle school. They send their princess off to school with her crown neatly polished and her entourage intact. But rarely do two princesses happily exist in the same place at the same time, much less hundreds converging on a first day at middle school. So, battle lines are drawn.
It can cause your daughter a lot of confusion when she suddenly realizes there are many princesses, all vying for the same kind of attention or acceptance. She may return home from her first day at middle school confused, lost, and full of hate for everything she once loved. She may feel like a boxer who has engaged in a boxing match all day. Continue reading “Princesses and Bullies”
For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon Me and come and pray to Me, and I will hear you. You will seek Me and find Me, when you seek Me with all your heart. –Jeremiah 29:11-13
“You’re fired!” are two words we never expect to hear. That kind of feedback conveys a message to the ears of the one receiving it that says; “You’re no longer worthy. You’re a failure. We don’t need you anymore. You didn’t do well. You didn’t make “the mark.” You are a loser. You are wrong. You can’t do anything right. We’re better off without you.”
The impact of those two little words can be overwhelming: “Your dreams are gone. Things won’t turn out the way you thought after all. How could I have been so stupid? What a waste of time this was…what’s wrong with me? I must not be good. I must be a failure.” Being fired from a job can pull the rug from underneath you, making you feel lost, alone, betrayed, and even, helpless to know what to do. Continue reading “Fired By Your Teenager”
Tough Guys and Drama Queens
For almost 40 years, we’ve been passionate about guiding kids and parents through the turbulent teenage years. Tough Guys and Drama Queens has been a huge part of that mission, and we’re thrilled to be able to offer it now, to you, as a free online course!
This two-week course will give you a look into why traditional parenting techniques aren’t as effective as they used to be, the pressures they face in today’s culture, and how to build a stronger relationship with your teen throughout the tricky experiences they’ll have during these years.